Thursday, March 21, 2013

No Judgement

When we visit Gammy and Gampa, we have to get creative at bath time since they don't have a tub. No  judgement based on what you're about to see...

... he loves it!!! I tried giving him a bath in the shower before we realized that this sink would be perfect. We have a few toys and it's almost as good as home.

What can I say, I just don't get the moms that pass judgement on other moms? I mean, we've all been there right? Either judging or being judged... but seriously, why? This mom-thing is hard enough as it is without tearing each other down. Every mother is doing what she thinks is best for her child and her choice doesn't make your choice right or wrong. We are all simply doing the best we can. There is no recipe to x+y=great kid or v+p=not so great, etc.

We've always had choices... cloth, disposable, breast, formula, and on and on... but now there is so much scrutiny. Do you breastfeed? Exclusively or do you use a bottle? Do you pump? How long are you going to breastfeed? Then do you ever get judged on how you answer? Yes, a bottle, yes, a year... then do you judge me because it wasn't two years or feel bad because you only breastfed for eight months? Why the competition  I feel like that old African saying is true, it takes a village. If we're all on the same parenting team then why do we feel the need to compare and judge? Why can't we just help and uplift each other on our quests to simply do the best we can. I am guilty of judging and I'm also guilty of being judged (trust me, you can always feel the stares), I'm not saying I'm perfect but I'm saying that we should drop the charade and try to help the other moms.

Here's my for instance before I shut up for the evening. On our plane the other night there was a mom who had an inconsolable 20 month old. You could hear the huffs and puffs from other irritated flyers, and I thought to myself that could be any of us. The majority of the people on the flight had children with them (it's spring break), had children at home (or grown) or will have children. I wish they would've just put theirself if that mom's shoes for thirty seconds. Trust me, she hears her baby and she's doing the best she can to quiet her. She was doing the best she could so why berate her for it, I'm sure she felt (and heard) the judgement.

Try to love one another and save the judgement. We're all just doing the best we can.

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